I'm Sorry
by Jass17
Summary: Set during the events of Season 3 Episode 17. What happens if Lucas succumbs to the pressure of having his Mother blame him for Keith's death while having to deal with the aftermath of the school shooting as well as his HCM? Read to find out - Enjoy!


**Author's Note: Set during the events of Season 3 Episode 17 - Who Will Survive, and What Will Be Left of Them. Lucas' relationship status is single during this story. Please Read & Review. Enjoy! **

Lucas Scott stared longingly at the picture in front of him. The picture held his younger self and the Father he would never have, Keith Scott.

It had been almost a week since the shooting at Tree Hill High, almost a week since Jimmy Edwards supposedly killed Lucas' beloved Uncle, and then himself. It had been almost a week since his Mother had spoken to him, looked at him even. Even though the words were never spoken aloud, he knew she blamed him for the death of her fiancé, in her eyes; Lucas might as well have pulled the trigger.

A dull ache within his chest brought the teenager from his thoughts. His medication had run out around the time of the shooting, no matter how much he worked, he just couldn't seem to find enough money to buy a refill. He knew he should probably tell someone about his heart condition, but he just couldn't. With all that had happened he just couldn't bear to become another burden to them all. The fact that he virtually hadn't eaten anything the past few days definitely didn't help, nor did the fact that he had managed to get around five hours of sleep in total this week but he would manage.

"Why did you have to go, Keith?" Lucas murmured under his breath, just as he heard his Mother, Karen Roe, walk into his bedroom.

"Did you pull Dan out of the fire?" was the first sentence his Mother had spoken before all hell broke loose within the bedroom of Lucas Scott.

Sighing as he stood from his position on his bed, he replied, "Mom, I-" but was interrupted by her.

"Did you?" she demanded, a weary look in her eyes.

"Yes" he deadpanned.

What came next was unexpected by both Mother and Son; the deafening sound of Karen's hand against Lucas' cheek, causing the young man's head to snap backwards and his frail form to stumble slightly. Pure hurt flashed across Lucas' eyes before his Mother continued.

"You selfish, stupid, Boy" the younger of the two winced at her words, "Did you think about me? Just once think about me and what my life would be like if I lost you?"

Lucas looked up at his Mom and instantly regretted it, seeing her eyes filled with hatred and disgust at the boy she raised.

"Running into burning buildings, high schools with guns, did I raise an idiot?!" she yelled, making him snap.

"I know, okay, I know! It's my fault!" He shouted back, jabbing a finger into his own chest, stepping closer to Karen. "If I didn't go back in there, Keith would still be here!"

Gradually, his voice became softer and weaker with every word he spoke, the dull ache within his heart increasing ever so slightly.

"And I know that…and I'm sorry" The teenager finished, bowing his head as he slowly broke down into a state of tears, only looking up when his Mother spoke once more.

"Well 'Sorry' isn't gonna bring him back, is it?" The Mother who once claimed to love him spat, slamming the door as she left, leaving her Son in a confused and hurt state.

He looked on at the place where his Mother had just been standing, where she had basically told him what he was afraid of believing was true. Only when black dots began clouding his vision did he stop looking, instead trying to keep himself from falling, releasing his hold on the picture frame he realised he had been holding all this time, letting it crash to the floor. Lucas soon followed as both is legs and his heart gave out.

After hearing the loud noise both the picture frame and her Son had made, Karen raced back into the room, finding Lucas lying lifelessly at her feet, blood covering part of his hand where it had connected with the glass from the frame.

"What have I done?" Karen asked herself before she fell to her knees beside her Son, pulling him towards her while calling his name, looking for any response.

After checking his pulse and finding it to be barely detectable, she scrambled for her cell phone, pulling it out of her pocket and immediately calling 911.

"911 operators, how can I help you?" The calm and collected voice of a female operator came through the phone.

"Please help me, my son collapsed…h-he's not breathing." The neither calm nor collected voice of Karen Roe replied as she clung onto her Son in desperation.

"An ambulance is on its way, but I need you to stay on the line for me, okay?" The operator responded after Karen hurriedly gave the right address to her. "Does your Son have any medical conditions?"

"H-He's perfectly healthy as far as I know"

"Alright, Ma'am the ambulance is right outside; paramedics are coming in right now"

Within seconds paramedics arrived and began attending to the sick teenager, causing Karen to have to leave her Son's side and watch in horror as Lucas' body went into a series of spasms as defibrillator paddles were applied to his chest in an effort to revive him. After around four to five tries, a pulse was detected, allowing the paramedics to lift the teenager onto a stretcher, load him and his Mother into the ambulance and begin their journey to the hospital.

Upon arrival, Lucas' heart rate had dropped an immense amount, causing doctors and nurses to rush him into the emergency room, behind closed doors, leaving Karen no more than a weeping mess in the waiting room.

"Don't take him from me. Don't take him from me." The distraught Mother prayed as she waited, later calling Nathan, Haley and Dan who had arrived mere moments after the call had come.

Together they sat, waiting for someone, anyone to tell them their loved one was okay.


End file.
